From Micromanager to Mentor: How I Learned to Adapt My Leadership Style Through Product Phases

At Capital One, I discovered a game-changing concept while managing cross-functional teams: Situational Leadership. The premise is elegantly simple—there is no single "best" leadership style. Instead, effective leaders adjust their approach based on two key factors: the competence and commitment levels of individuals. This means being highly directional with beginners while providing autonomy to experienced achievers.

It's such a simple yet powerful concept, but I've watched many people managers unknowingly fall into the micromanagement trap by applying a single lens to all team members. What struck me was how this same principle applies beautifully to product management. Just like products evolve through distinct phases, our leadership approach needs to evolve too. Each phase demands a different balance of direction and support, just like individual team members need different approaches based on their competence and commitment levels.

The Four Phases of Product Leadership

Here's what I've learned about matching leadership styles to product development phases:

Phase 1: Initial Scoping and Discovery - The "Tell Me Everything" Stage

When you're in those early, uncertain days—trying to figure out if there's even a market for your idea—you need to be highly directive. I call this the "tell me everything" stage because that's exactly what your team needs from you.

What this looks like in practice:

• Creating detailed research protocols (yes, down to the specific questions to ask users)

• Setting precise milestones for validation activities

• Making decisive calls about scope and resource allocation

• Personally reviewing all research findings before making go/no-go decisions

In this phase, I write out customer interview scripts, specify exactly which user segments to target, and define the precise metrics we'd use to validate our hypotheses. It felt controlling, but it was exactly what the team needed when everything was uncertain.

Phase 2: Early Development and MVP - The "Let Me Explain Why" Stage

Once you have some clarity on what you're building but the team is still figuring out how to build it, you shift into coaching mode. This is the "let me explain why" stage—you're still providing direction, but now you're also building your team's understanding.

What this looks like in practice:

• Explaining the reasoning behind product decisions and trade-offs

• Facilitating collaborative problem-solving sessions

• Working closely with engineers to connect user research to technical decisions

• Creating structured learning opportunities through retrospectives

During the MVP phase, I spend considerable time in design reviews—not to approve everything, but to help the team understand how technical decisions would impact the user journey. It was about building their product intuition, not just getting tasks done.

Phase 3: Growth and Scaling - The "How Can I Help?" Stage

This is where many of us (including myself) struggle to adapt. Once your product has found its groove and your team has developed real expertise, you need to shift to a supporting role. I think of this as the "how can I help?" stage.

What this looks like in practice:

• Facilitating decisions rather than making them all yourself

• Focusing on removing blockers and providing resources

• Empowering team members to own specific product areas

• Creating frameworks for autonomous decision-making

During this phase, I establish clear success metrics and decision-making frameworks, then step back to let individual team members own specific user journeys. My job became less about directing and more about enabling.

Phase 4: Mature and Stable Product - The "What Do You Need From Me?" Stage

For mature products with established teams, you move into full delegation mode. This is the "what do you need from me?" stage, where your role becomes almost entirely strategic.

What this looks like in practice:

• Setting high-level objectives and letting teams determine execution

• Focusing on long-term vision while teams handle day-to-day decisions

• Monitoring outcomes rather than activities

• Concentrating on stakeholder management and strategic planning

For a mature product, I set quarterly objectives around conversion improvements and let experienced team leads figure out how to achieve them. They know the product better than I do at this point—my job is to ensure they have what they need to succeed.

How I Learned to Adapt (And How You Can Too)

Develop Phase Awareness Through Systematic Assessment

I regularly assess where each product sits in its development lifecycle. Rather than relying on gut feelings, I track specific indicators to identify phase transitions:

Discovery to MVP:

• Clear user personas with validated behaviors and motivations

• Competitive analysis reveals clear differentiation opportunities

• Technical feasibility validated through proof-of-concept work

MVP to Growth:

• Pilot results follow expected patterns from user research

• Key business metrics show consistent month-over-month growth

• User retention stabilizes

Growth to Mature:

• Feature requests shift from new capabilities to refinement and optimization

• Team members develop deep expertise in specific product areas

• Growth rate plateaus but remains positive

Build Your Leadership Toolkit Systematically

Instead of defaulting to my natural leadership preferences, I deliberately practiced each leadership style through specific techniques:

Directive Leadership (Discovery Phase):

• Created structured decision-making frameworks for common scenarios (user research scope, feature prioritization)

• Practiced writing detailed briefs that answer "what, why, when, and how" for every initiative

Coaching Leadership (MVP Phase):

• Mastered the "explain your reasoning" technique—walking the team through trade-offs and connecting user research to technical decisions

Supporting Leadership (Growth Phase):

• Learned facilitation techniques to run meetings where I ask questions instead of providing answers

• Created escalation paths so team members know how to proceed autonomously

Delegating Leadership (Mature Phase):

• Developed strategic communication skills to distill complex business context into clear objectives

• Focused on outcome-based success metrics that don't require daily oversight

Most importantly, I've learned that effective product management isn't just about knowing the "right" leadership style—it's about having the flexibility to adapt your approach as your products and teams evolve.

Your Turn

If you're reading this and thinking, "Oh no, I'm totally that micromanaging PM," don't worry—we've all been there. The key is recognizing when your current approach isn't serving your product's needs anymore and having the courage to adapt.

Start by honestly assessing where your products are in their lifecycle. Are you being directive with a mature product that needs delegation? Are you delegating when your team actually needs more coaching? The answers might surprise you.

Remember: your product's success depends not just on what you build, but on how you lead the team building it. Make sure your leadership evolves as thoughtfully as your product does.

What's your experience with adapting leadership styles? I'd love to hear about your own "aha moments" in the comments below.